Saturday, February 6, 2010

2009 In Review: Looking Forward

During out Thanksgiving dinner with our Small Group, another couple announced they were expecting a child . . . and they weren’t trying. I, for some strange reason, was prepared for the news. But Kevin was not prepared. He was devastated. It broke my heart to see him upset. So that Friday after group, I called the fertility office in Fontana. I was originally going to wait until after the first of the year, but I wanted to do this for my husband.

We had our first consultation with the fertility doctor on December 7th. She was wonderful. She asked a bunch of questions and we even did an ultra sound to determine that I was indeed ovulating. They took 12 viles of blood that day for testing and sent us home with instructions for our next tests. My blood came back fine but she was worried about one hormone level and wanted me to come back when I started my next cycle for a saline sonogram and more blood tests.

So I waited to start my next cycle. I waited and waited. On the morning of December 22, I still hadn’t started so I took a home pregnancy test. It was positive. I was shocked. Kevin was getting ready for work, so I didn’t tell him. He needed to go in that day and I didn’t want him to worry. I emailed my doctor and she sent me in for a blood test. It was also positive. She wanted me to go back in 48 hours later for another test to make sure things were progressing.

I went to Target and bought a bib that said “I Love Daddy.” I wrapped it up and planned to give it to Kevin on Christmas morning. But as I thought about what if the blood test on the 24th was bad news, I knew I would need Kevin’s support. I gave him the gift on Christmas Eve morning. We were excited, but hesitant to get our hopes up too much.
The blood test came back and the levels had doubled. We began to get excited.

We headed to Bakersfield to spend the New Year with family. On the morning of the 2nd, I had some bleeding. I called the nurse and she suggested we go to urgent care. We waited for almost four hours before we were seen. The doctor did an ultra sound. He found the sac, but no embryo. I took another blood test and the levels were very high. The doctor said that this meant there was a fertilized egg somewhere outside of the uterus and he sent us to the local hospital for a more advanced ultrasound. We weren’t ready to tell my family yet, but as they had no idea where we had been for the past 5 and a half hours, we spilled the beans. My family cried with us as I tried to look for the positives. At least we know now that I can get pregnant.

We headed to the hospital for another ultrasound. The technician was quite odd and we couldn’t hardly tell if he was talking to us or himself. He took a look around and pointed out the ovaries and tubes. Then he paused and in the most monotone voice said “There’s the baby.” Kevin and I looked at each other very confused. Kevin then asked, “Is it in the uterus?” The tech then pointed to the outline of the uterus. Kevin then said “When we came in here we were under the impression there was an embryo but that it wasn’t in the uterus.” The tech then said “No, it’s inside.” Our final question was, “Can we go back to being excited?” The tech let us listen to the faint heart beat and printed us a picture. It looks like a seed.
We went back to Fontana, had another ultrasound and were released back to our regular Riverside doctor, who did another ultra sound.

Today I am 11 and a half weeks pregnant. Tuesday we go back to our doctor to hear the heartbeat. So far everything is progressing normally. The doctors called it “Conception by Consultation.” I’m still very nervous that it won’t actually happen. We are excited to see my little belly start to grow.

God has taught me so much this past year. Most of which I know would not have happened if we had gotten pregnant when we wanted to. Thirteen consecutive months isn’t actually a long time, but in the middle of it, it felt like an eternity to us. I have learned more about my struggle with doubt and learning to release control. I praise God for the things He has done, and the things He continues to teach me.
Thank you all for your prayers and support. Some of you have opened your hearts and shared some very personal things with me. Your encouragement has meant the world to us. We covet your prayers as we continue to learn what God has planned for us. As we learn to be the parents He desires us to be, trusting His guidance and following the wisdom of His Word. Thank you.

7 comments:

  1. I was hoping that this is where this story was going :) Congratulations!

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  2. A HUGE CONGRATULATIONS!! I was hoping this was where the story was going too :) You will be a wonderful mommy! And I will continue to keep you and your husband in my prayers for a healthy pregnancy and baby! When are you due?

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  3. I love you both very much and am pleased to hear of the blessing that will be on this earth. S/He will have a the most wonderful parents to love, nuture and encourage them in the way of the Lord! God is good and He's good all the time. :-) Congratulations; I am praying for the three of you and those prayers started today. This makes me smile -- a LOT! Love you Bekah! Oh Granny wants to know...can we name it if its a girl...Esther Jean!!! hahahahahah!!!!

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  4. A Grandma for the third time. I am so excited.

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  5. I had a feeling that this Year in Review was building to this news! (Or at least I hoped it was!!!) CONGRATS BEKAH!!!!!!!!! I'M SO EXCITED FOR YOU!!!! (Now, I want to remind you that you were teasing me when I was crying about my mind games back when I was preggers with Ava! Doesn't seem so crazy now, does it?! LOL)

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  6. AHHHH!!! Congrats you guys. Oh we're so happy for you.

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