New Work Space

I have a little bit of a bug and decided to stay home today. I was home on Wednesday as well, but had to go in yesterday for a meeting. As I am saving my voice and not spreading germs, I decided to use the peace and quiet to get caught up on some work stuff.

Here is my work station today.

Not exactly ergonomically correct, but I needed to spread out my paperwork, and be by a phone jack. Yes, it's true, I have jumped in my DeLorean and I am back to the year 2000 using a dial-up connection. Well, to write this post I am not, but the only way to get into the system at work is by dial-up. Needless to say I don't work very fast, however, I think I am still as productive because I am not being interrupted.

Even the boys have left me alone to do my work.

They have been quite good today despite the trouble they got into last night. Not so much they, as Charlie. We decided to hang out upstairs last night because I was rearranging the bedrooms. Bubba has become quite good at letting me know he needs/wants to go outside. So last night he whined and we headed downstairs. Charlie followed only half-way down and the sat in the middle of the stairs not to be budged. Bubba did his business, number 1 and 2, and we headed back up. Not 10 minutes later I noticed pee. We scolded, put Charlie out, he peed some more, cleaned up the carpet, and went back to moving. I was blaming Charlie for farting when Kevin said he had been smelling it for a while. I looked around to see the biggest pile of poop yet. Needless to say Charlie went out for a while. We had gone several weeks without a real accident, and I thought we were doing so well. Resolve has become my best friend.

But today has been good to me. After all, I have been able to wear these babies all day.

Music and Lyrics

I (along with my father) have never liked the term “Christian Music”. Music is sound and notes. Lyrics can have a Christian message, but music cannot. I grew up with piano and violin lessons and love music, all kinds. Even as I sit here typing, I have a light classical sound of Tchaikovsky in the back ground. I listen to music. I hear key changes and crescendos. I listen to music, thus I can’t really use music to distract me or put me to sleep. I believe music is very powerful and can change your emotion in a heartbeat. People get paid a lot of money to put the right music in a movie to make you feel what is happening. Because I listen to music, it has changed how I worship in church. I have had to teach myself to not be distracted by change in tempo or key. I often close my eyes in church, simply so I am not distracted by those around me.This isn’t for everyone, but I taught myself to listen to the words I was singing and what they meant, not what I felt from the music. If I felt close to God, or broken, or ashamed, I wanted it to be a true change in emotion by my thought and the words I was hearing or singing.

The second part to my idiosyncrasies of music is that I am easily irritated by modern cheesy so-called Christian lyrics. I like songs with depth. So when a teeny-bopper boy bands sings "I wanna know, wanna know what you were thinkin’ I can’t imagine why it didn’t even sink in They say you never know what you got till it’s gone", the only thing I am moved to do is change the channel. I am not saying everyone needs to adopt this view. Kevin loves Air1 and I am glad there is a positive alternative out there for people who need something different for themselves or their family.

But today on my way to work, every other station had someone ranting about the stimulus bill or the housing foreclosure bailout, and I switched my dial to Air1. (I guess radios don’t actually have dials anymore). This song came on and I was moved.

Sanctus Real - Whatever You’re Doing
From the album We Need Each Other

It’s time for healing, time to move on,
it’s time to fix what’s been broken too long
Time to make right what has been wrong;
it’s time to find my way to where I belong

Chorus:
There’s a wave that’s crashing over me,
and all I can do is surrender
Whatever You’re doing inside of me
It feels like chaos, but somehow there’s peace
And it’s hard to surrender to what I can’t see,
but I’m giving in to something heavenly

Time for a milestone, time to begin again,
re-evaluate who I really am
Am I doing everything to follow Your will
or just climbing aimlessly over these hills?
So show me what it is You want from me
I give everything – I surrender

Chorus:

Time to face up, clean this old house
Time to breathe in and let everything out
that I’ve wanted to say for so many years
Time to release all my held back tears
Whatever You’re doing inside of me
It feels like chaos, but I believe …

You’re up to something bigger than me
Larger than life, something heavenly

Whatever You’re doing inside of me
It feels like chaos, but now I can see
This is something bigger than me
Larger than life
Something heavenly, something heavenly

Time to face up, clean this old house
Time to breathe in and let everything out

I love the part where they say “Whatever you’re doing inside of me, it feels like chaos, but somehow there’s peace.” God works in amazing ways. He turns your life in every direction, but yet when you trust him and let him have control, there is still an overwhelming sense of peace. I have never been able to describe how two completely opposite feelings could be happening at the same time, and love how the artist describes it.

The artist asks himself and God “Am I doing everything to follow your will or just climbing aimlessly over these hills?” This is the question I have been working to the past few weeks. “God, am I doing everything you have planned for me or am I just going through the motions? What am I missing out of simply because I am not seeking you in every little thing I do.”

God uses everyday things to speak to us and today this song spoke to me.

Three Months

Our boys are 3 months old and growing quite fast. Stretched out, Charlie is 44 inches from toe to toe. Bubba is 42. Bubba definitely got more of the Pit Bull traits whereas Kevin calls Charlie his Great Lab; he definitely has some of those Great Dane qualities. Unfortunately, Charlie is a crier. He cries during his bath, and when you leave him, and when he is walking. All in all they are both very good boys. We love being at home just hanging out.

I am well aware of the fact that I have become a crazy dog person.

Snips and Snails and Puppy Dog Tails

Brendan liked playing with Bubba. Luckily for the rest of is, Bubba slept through the whole thing.

Breakfast of Champions

A few weekends ago, Kevin and I headed to Disneyland for the morning. On the way we stopped for our favorite breakfast. Nothing beats a Sausage McMuffin with egg.

Squash Shiver

A few weeks ago Rachel brought Brendan over and we fed him squash for the very first time. Actually, Rachel fed while I video taped. From what we can tell, he didn't really like it. With every bite he gave a little shudder. We thought it was hysterical. Here is a little clip of Brendan trying squash at six month.

Gift Giving Husband

I never considered myself a "gifts person". I am terrible at giving gifts. I over analyis it, stress about it, and end up going so practicle, it's almost disheartening. It's not that I don't want to make people happy with a pretty package with a shiny bow, but it just never works out like I want it to. Because I am such a terrible gift giver, I never put much thought into receiving gifts. I like getting gifts, but typically I would choose quality time. But lately, my husband has been showering me with presents; and I love it!

This past week a Real Simple Magazine showed up in the mail, and Kevin simply said "I think I ordered this for you." I love the magazine, but it was never something I thought to order for myself. He has bought some major gifts lately, i.e. the tickets to Phantom, but I really like the little ones. It shows a simple, "I was thinking of you today." I pray I can show him the same.

Phantom

A year ago ago Kevin sent me an email entitled "Phantom" with multiple attachments. My heart beat a little fast as I thought he was suggesting we go to the Opera or even better yet, had purchased tickets. To my disappointment, the attachments were pictures of our friends new pit bull, named Phantom. Although Phantom was adorable, I had to admit it was not what I had expected. I had never seen the Phantom of the Opera and refused to see the film until I had seen it on stage.


On Christmas morning, Kevin surprised me with a whole tub full of gifts. One was an envelope with tickets for Phantom of the Opera in Hollywood. So on January 28, Kevin and I headed to the Pantages Theater. When we got to the theater I headed to the stairs. When Kevin asked where I was going I told him I was going upstairs, where I always sat. Kevin just laughed and said, "Not tonight."Kevin had purchased orchestra seats and we had a beautiful view of the stage.


The play was beautiful, and the actors did a wonderful job. Definitely worth the wait! Unfortunately, I left my camera in the car. So we snapped one picture in the car, on one of the theater to prove we were there. A wonderful date night!

That Kind of Week

Growing Up in a Family of Six

My friend Lisa has recently gone from a family of four to a family of five as her niece has come to live with her. She was seeking advice from parents of larger families, and here is my letter to her.

Dearest Lisa,
First, I am not a mother, and will therefore be sharing memories and experiences, not advice. Second, little Paul and Anna are two of the best-behaved children I have ever met so you must be doing something right. I do think you will be fine with three in tow. I came from a family of six and although our household looked crazy to an outsider, it was all we knew. Here are a few memories that may or may not unique to a larger household. Some of these were simply because money was tight, not because there were four kids.

1. I always heard, “It’s what’s for dinner.” My dad always said he was not a short order cook, not that any of us knew what that was at the time. We were never given the option of whether we wanted to eat what was served, or whether we even wanted to eat. We sat at the table until our plate was cleaned.
2. We always had dinner together at the table. No TV.
3. To celebrate individual accomplishments, we had a giant red plate that the member of honor was served their dinner; birthday, graduations, awards received, or other jobs well-done.
4. My sister and I shared a room most of my life. We split the dresser and the closet right down the middle. We had to ask to wear the others clothes. Our toys were stored together, but we often had the same thing in two different colors. To this day, we get the same gift in two different colors. Be forewarned, Rachel and I did not get along when we were younger. We fought all the time. It used to make my mother cry. She always said “I had you close together so you would be friends.” Even after we moved and I was 16, we still fought constantly. It wasn’t until college when we were both out of the house that we began to get along. Today, my sister and I are best friends and I can’t imagine life without her.
5. We started camping when I was 10. My parents bought a beat-up tent trailer and we went all over California and the West. I used to envy my friends who took two week vacations to Florida or DC. But we had the best (and the worst) times together. I used to complain about the dirt, and the smell of smoke, and the 2 minute showers. I have memories of my family and places that I wouldn’t trade for the world.
6. We had chores. Not for money, but because we were a member of a family. I remember picking up dog poop at a pretty early age. One would set the table, another would clear. Eventually we moved to washing dishes and laundry.
7. We received an allowance as a member of the family and pulled our fair share. We were not paid for our grades. It is what was expected from us. I began tithing at 8 years old.
8. We read books as a family one chapter at a time. We borrowed old movies from the library.
9. We made homemade popcorn and went to the drive in movies.
10. We took a drive. We seemed to play this game on Saturday afternoons.
“Where are we going?”
“For a drive.”
“For how long?”
“For a while.”
“How will we know when we get there?”
“We’ll just know.”
“How much longer?”
“Five more minutes.”
“How much longer now?”
“Five more minutes”
11. We went to church as a family. No one ever argued because there wasn’t an option.
12. Whenever we went somewhere as a family we would count off in order of addition to the family. Dad was number 1. My dad reminded me of this when he performed our wedding ceremony. We have added two in the past few years; my sister’s husband is number 7, and Kevin is number 8.
13. We focused on family more than individual time. We had one on one time with our parents occasionally, but knew the benefits or working as a team and a unit. We did do things split between the girls and boys.
14. My parents would hug and kiss in front of us as well as disagree. When I told them it was gross, they told me “We want you to see we love each other even when we ague.”
15. Discipline was different for each of us. Rachel was spanked and Jonathan was put in time out. I was told “We’re so disappointed” and I would bawl for days. All of us were grounded at one time or another. I will never forget the time my mother told Rachel she couldn’t have a birthday party unless her room was clean. No one believed her until Rachel didn’t have a party that year.
16. We had a midnight curfew out of respect for everyone living in the house.
17. Phone calls were not accepted after 9:00 on weeknights. My mother believed in the power of a good night’s sleep.
18. We prayed as a family.

You have been and will remain in my prayers,
Bekah